Fear of the Lord

As I climbed into a little 8-foot dinghy off the 47-foot sailboat I looked out over the water and it was dead still like glass. Not a single ripple could be seen for miles. We had sailed 2 days of a 5 day journey and anchored for the night at Boca Chita Key which is a small uninhabited island in the Atlantic 22 miles off the coast of Miami. We anchored about a mile off the island and took the dinghy in to explore the island and do a little snorkeling before we went back to the sailboat for dinner. It took about 30 minutes in the dinghy to get to the island. The water was a crystal clear turquoise blue and even though we were miles offshore I could still clearly see the bottom. The vivid colors of the fish and coral tapestry went on for what seemed like forever. The sun danced off the crystal clear turquoise water like a million diamonds. The water looked almost luminous. This natural beauty was like nothing I had ever experienced. 

Once on Boca Chita Key we explored the tiny key, snorkeled the reef, and the mangroves inlets that were surrounding the island. There were so many fish, turtles, rays, birds, and wildlife everywhere. It was hard to take it all in. 

We became so immersed in our adventure that we lost track of time but when we got out of the water and sat on the shore of the island I noticed that the sun was hidden behind clouds. As the clouds increased they were dark and ominous and wind started to pick up almost instantly. I looked over to my friend Brian and His wife Abby who owned the sailboat and said, “Man the wind is picking up, maybe we should head back to the ship.” Brian agreed, “Those clouds look nasty, we should hurry!”

We ran to the dinghy and the 3 of us got in and started to make the 30-minute 1.5-mile dinghy ride from Boca Chita Key back to the sailboat. The wind and ocean started to show their force and soon we were trying to motor in 2 foot seas which our little dinghy was not equipped to handle. The waves were crashing over the bow and sides of the boat. The little 15-horse outboard motor started to sputter, and after several waves hit us it stalled. The dinghy was now at the mercy of the waves and strong currents of the Atlantic. Water was now coming in the back of the boat. Brian was desperately trying to start the engine. I looked out over the rough ocean and all I saw was endless white-capped waves as far as the eye could see. I was petrified and felt completely helpless. I looked back at Brian who is a 25-year Coast Guard veteran sailor and I could see he was extremely worried and frustrated by our situation, as he frantically tried to start the motor. This didn’t ease my fear in any way. Brian instructed me to sit in the bottom of the dinghy to give it more center weight so it would not capsize. As I sat there in the bottom of that dinghy with water up around my waist and waves continuing to crash over the side, plus seeing that we were only halfway to the sailboat and were now drifting quickly further away from the sailboat I was paralyzed in fear. In my fear, I softly said “Jesus.” 

When I said “Jesus” it felt like someone  pushed my head down between my legs. I wanted to look up to brace myself for the next wave but for some reason I could not lift my head. So I closed my eyes and repeatedly began to say the name of Jesus. After several minutes, which seemed like hours, I heard the engine start and we started to make our way slowly to the ship. The engine stalled several more times and I sat there with my head between my legs, eyes closed and waves crashing over my head saying the name of Jesus. In the middle of the waves, wind, and rain while I was scared to death I felt God's presence surround me and I heard him say over the noise, confusion, and fear “You do not need to fear. Take your eyes off the storm and trust in me. I got you.” Which was a very hard thing to do given the very real circumstances we were currently in.

After 40 minutes of fighting this storm in a little dinghy, we finally made it back to the sailboat. Trying to get out of the dinghy onto the sailboat in 2-foot waves was pretty comical; we looked like drunken sailors trying to stagger on deck. So the laughs we had trying to get on board released some of the fear and tension we had just endured. 

On the larger 47-foot sailboat we barely felt the 2-foot waves and wind squalls. So after drying out and grabbing a bite to eat in the galley I went up on deck and sat on the side of the boat with my feet dangling over the side.  As I looked out over the Atlantic the fear I felt just a few moments earlier had transitioned to complete awe. I was so amazed at the vastness of the ocean and now had a firsthand respect for the raw power that it yields. I grew up on the water watching huge winter storms pound the coast of Maine, but this was the first experience I had ever had at being completely helpless by the raw power of the ocean. For 40 minutes I felt just how insignificant I was at its mercy. 

As I Sat there on the deck of that sailboat a few passages of scripture I had been meditating on recently had new meaning. Through this experience God gave me new understanding of the Fear of the Lord. 

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭128‬:‭1‬-‭6‬ ‭TPT I love how the Passion Translation pened this verse 

”How joyous and blessed are those who fear and love the Lord and bow low before God, ready to obey him! Your reward will be prosperity, happiness, and well-being. Your wife will bless your heart and home. Your children will bring you joy as they gather around your table. Yes, this is God’s generous reward for those who love him. May the Lord bless you out of his Zion-glory! May you see the prosperity of Jerusalem throughout your lifetime. And may you be surrounded by your grandchildren. Happiness to you! And happiness to Israel!“

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Too often we have this misconception that the fear of the Lord is similar to what I felt during the storm in that small dinghy. Where I was scared for my life and felt hopeless no matter how hard I tried and was at the mercy of an uncompassionate angry ocean. However, the Fear of the Lord is actually how I felt sitting on the side of the larger sailboat where I was in complete awe at the power, beauty, and majesty of the ocean from the safety of being in a secure place. Please don’t get it twisted just because we can sit on a sailboat and be in complete awe at the power of the storm does not mean we in any way can control or ignore that power when it suits us. That same power that causes us to stand in Awe, when disrespected, will naturally dispense correction and judgment on those who do not respect or surrender to its power. We took the ocean for granted and failed to use wisdom when we saw the calmness of the water. We ignored the power of the ocean in that moment and it could have literally cost me my life. 

So many times we do the same thing with the Lord, we take the calmness of His love, grace, and mercy for granted and by doing so we ignore His power. If we do not come before him with the awe and respect he deserves, the storms in life will consume us and could ultimately destroy us. However, when we put Him in his rightful place He will give us the wisdom we need to avoid the storms but also the knowledge and understanding to take us through them. His ultimate desire is that we will stand in awe of Him and love him because of all he has done for us.   

Proverbs 9:10, “The fear of the Lord (awe of the Lord) is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”

Proverbs 1:7, “The fear of the Lord (awe of the Lord) is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction."

Psalms 130:4, "But with you there is forgiveness, that you may be feared."

Awe, forgiveness, wisdom, knowledge, and understanding are intertwined.

Is God all-powerful? Without a question. He is all power. Everything in existence comes from Him! We still have not scratched the surface of discovering all that He spoke. Could He wipe us out of existence with one word? Absolutely, he could! But it is not his desire to flex His power so that we are scared of Him like some playground bully. His desire is for us to be able to stand under the shadow of his wings and look out at everything he has done for us and be in complete awe at the power of His name to understand that everything God has done he has done for us. Why? Because He is a loving God, not one to be scared of. When we read Psalms 130:4 the author does not seem afraid of God in fact just the opposite. Straight after verse 4, he goes on to write how “his soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning”(Ps 130: 5-6). He fully embraces the fact that “with the Lord there is steadfast love” and “plentiful redemption” (Ps 130:7). Without forgiveness we could never approach God nor would we want to. Without the cross God would only be a fearful judge, jury, and executioner. But this was not his desire. He wants us to see him as a loving Father, not a Dictator. He does not use his power to enslave us. So many have this concept that He is up there giddy waiting for us to fail so He can elicit hellfire judgment on us. If that were the case He would have never created us with free will he would have created us slaves. If that were the case there would be no love at all, only bondage and control by a tyrant God. 

The fear of the Lord is one being conquered by His love. When someone or something has been conquered it means that they have completely surrendered. It entails awe and wonder of God’s greatness, rooted in the love that God has first shown to us. It is having reverence for his power while walking in the confidence that we are sons and daughters in His Family. It is recognizing who God is and not only that but putting Him in his rightful position in our lives. The Fear of the Lord is our surrender and  obedience to Him from a place of love not of duty. 

As I meditate on Proverbs 9:10, Proverbs 1:7, Psalms 130:4 and Psalms 128: 1-6 I understand a few things. 

First: God has given me 100% authority over the choices I make. I don’t have to surrender or humble myself. I can put myself first. I can be a fool and despise His wisdom. I can reject forgiveness. However, I cannot then blame God and must take ownership of the consequences when the storms of life completely consume me. I take full accountability for everything and I am completely aware that I will be on my own and will fight the storms and demonic forces with my limited strength and understanding. I am taking full responsibility and would rather be a fool than walk in His ways and surrender to his love. 

Second: When I go low and exalt Him and stand in complete awe of who He is I surrender and I am conquered by his love and I am confident that He will bless me and give me wisdom and knowledge throughout all my phases of life. While life can be scary and at times overwhelming I can close my eyes while sitting in a dinghy up to my waist in stormwater and know without a doubt He will take me through it. This awe, or reverence, makes me think before I act or speak. His grace and forgiveness gives me access and creates in me a longing for His presence. As I gain wisdom, I gain knowledge. As my knowledge of Him expands my love for Him grows deeper and deeper till He becomes my everything and I stand back in complete Awe that this all-powerful God chooses to love me and I am undone over and over again because of His steadfast love. 

Picture of Boca Chita Key as the clouds started to roll in. 😳